I wanted to start blogging to get back in touch with people and let people know what I am up to. For those of you who do not know, Dan (my husband) and I recently relocated to the East County area of San Diego, (about 10 miles from San Diego proper) because he got a promotion! (Yay Dan!) I also wanted to get back into the swing of writing on a regular basis, particularly when I feel like writing more poetry, responding to something I read or maybe sharing a yummy recipe that I tried! This first entry will be a short update about our move and transition to our new home. I hope you like it!
Move: We had a very short timeline from when Dan was offered his promotion to when we actually moved (about three weeks). This was our first time moving together since Dan moved into our old place a month before we married and I moved in right after our wedding. I'm sure many of you know, the first time moving is an INTERESTING learning experience! This was Dan's first time moving ever, and I had moved a few times as a child and then to and from college in Santa Barbara. (I was old school Indian and lived with my parents right up until the wedding day lol.) I am a calendar-writer, note-scribbler, checklist-maker person. Dan is much less neurotic. I am a planner by nature, right down to the silliest details.
As soon as the move was on the horizon, I immediately "hit the Pinterest." (Don't steal that! It's mine!) I had moving lists, zip code guides, packing advice, apartment search guides, room layouts, as well as the usual pictures of SD beaches and sunsets. (Yes we moved in beautiful California winter, people!)
The decision to move was- and wasn't- easy. Both of us grew up in the same hometown and loved being close to family and friends we had known our whole lives. Yes we had problems with our first apartment (our landlords had rinky-dinked all the repairs themselves. That was the easy part). We liked having our gym just a few steps away and knowing where everything was- our favorite restaurants, hiking trails, etc. We never needed to use a map. That sense of security was hard to leave.
Jobs: Dan called me at work one afternoon and told me about his job offer. I was happy for him but I knew we would have to decide quickly. Dan's employer had originally told him they saw a lot of potential in him so I was happy and proud - all those good wifey feelings. I had a great relationship with my boss Stephani, so she noticed that I seemed a little frazzled by the call. I was honest with her. I told her about the offer but that we would wait to decide. It wasn't a flowery joyful moment though. I struggle with anxiety - especially when it comes to spontaneity AND if something is going to hurt someone's feelings!
I had two jobs (part-time middle school pastor - mainly to girls, with a male co-pastor - BACK OFF FUNDIES! :) It's ok. I am one too.) I was also an administrative assistant at a staffing company owned by a friend's parents, and one of my cousins even worked there as one of their top-performing recruiters. Basically, I was addicted to work. I was fortunate enough to work with passionate people and do work that I enjoyed. Helping people is a great goal, but it took a lot of time. I was always behind on chores because I was either gone or drained from work. Consequently, our house was almost never in the condition to have people over, so we didn't have guests. ( And partly because of having our bedroom connected to the main room with no wall or door.)
I digress - Dan and I asked for prayer from our close friends and family. We knew that God would reveal His answer to us. Well I was scared because it started looking more and more like a yes- Actually more of a "YES!!!! --> --> (arrows towards San Diego)" After a week and a half I let both my employers know. It was hard because my family had been at PFB/Purpose Church since 1939, and I loved being part of the middle school ministry reboot. I had so many great ideas for events and curriculum that never came to fruition.
My new job is an administrative assistant position at a local mobile home park. It is very nice. It was originally a senior park but now it is all ages. My bosses are a very nice couple in their mid 60s-70s. They both used to live in Ontario. It is only a 15 minute drive away in the Oak Park area. I have enjoyed my first week there so far. My boss Lori is impressed that I already know how to use a check scanner and use deposit software. She gave me tomatoes from her little box garden today. I get along with her well. She is a Christian and she said she could tell right away that we had that in common. Her husband was raised LDS but doesn't practice. He is head of maintenance at the park. He is like a retired Daryl Dixon.
Friends:
Over the past few years I noticed my friendships changing. Graduating from college does that. Marriage does that. Changing jobs does that, and now moving has done that.
FLASHBACK: After college I moved back to into my parents' house. Unlike the many economically privileged Westmont students, I borrowed every penny my partial grants and scholarships didn't cover. I floated around socially and got back in touch with some people in the young adults group at my church, but I would never be part of the impenetrable APU clique. I joined a women's Bible Study that went well for a couple years, but it split after a group of classist girls thought we weren't good enough for the rest of them. It was hard because I wanted to stay friends with everyone and I wasn't part of the drama, but it just didn't happen.
Around this time I also suffered a bad allergic reaction while I was my real estate job. It was a warning sign that I was allergic to either wheat or dairy. So, I cut back on socializing to rest and take better care of myself. My college friends were all far away and our communication was starting to whittle down to Happy birthday" messages.
BACK TO PRESENT: Something really great about staying in your hometown is that Dan and I have a lot of mutual friends. We are both introverted, but I am more in the middle of the introvert-extrovert spectrum. I answer yes to almost every social invitation. Something really funny about our close friends Kevin and Jeanine is that she and I crossed paths at PFB junior high group before we knew the boys. It was already super clique-y then so we just talked and were nice to each other, but we remembered that years later. It was enough to keep us on good terms for the days when we would be using their washer and dryer and we would be babysitting their boys.
I've never made female friends very easily. I grew up with ALL THOSE BOYS (cousins), and although my addiction to playing with makeup started early, I just never had the desire to be super-obsessed with boys or becoming super-popular. My close friends were nerds like me; we were super square. Plus my parents didn't have any close friends with daughters my age. (Lots of girls I thought were my friends just ended up crushing on my cousins and ditching me.)
This section is OBVIOUSLY still in progress. (Why else would I be writing myself in non-nonsensical circles? Thank you for hanging in there!) As of now I have one friend, my cousin's wife Destiny and she is pretty awesome but I have a fear that I will get clingy and not want to make any other friends. We are meeting people at our new church. I guess I just need to be patient. Speaking of church, I found out a couple returned from adopting a son from China recently. I emailed the wife while they were still there and introduced myself. It was a start - a really big step for me!
Church: It shouldn't surprise you (if you know us) that we are Calvinists. (If it does, well it shouldn't.) (It also shouldn't surprise you that we are libertarians... but being a good libertarian, I will leave that out of my Church section.) We are becoming members of our local Reformed Church (United Reformed Church of North America). They are in the same classis as the Chino URCNA church that was one street away from our old house. This is one of the closest churches to our new house and we really like it. I like the hymns, the liturgy and that it's around 250 people. I have never had the "small church" experience before. We only have a few weeks left of our membership class. It is a church plant from the Escondido church so there are a lot of young families and it is very diverse. A couple weeks ago I even got to tease a guy who said he was from "Phillips Ranch." I told him, "Oh no. That is POMONA." He and Dan talked about Graziano's Pizza.
Around Town: We live just northwest of El Cajon in Santee, a town of about 50,000 people. It reminds us of Chino Hills. The San Diego River goes through it and there is a cool egg farm about a mile from our church.
Here are some pictures of our adventures:
Here is a picture of us in one of our favorite places, Mission Trails Regional Park. It is free, beautiful and close.
Here is a set of pictures from our trip to La Jolla, one of the most picturesque local beaches...
I promise my next entry will have a lot more structure! Thank you!
